We’ve all heard how important our self-talk is. Have you noticed the commentary and tone that it speaks to you with? That little voice in our head reflects our beliefs and the proverbial glass-half-full or half-empty attitude from which we create our lives. What can you do about it when you don’t like what it says?
Let me tell you the story of a client I worked with last Fall. Carol (not her real name) is over 60, living on her savings until she starts drawing her pension at 65. She lives by herself in a rented apartment in a city she recently moved to. And of course, it’s a pandemic… so there is very little socialization happening. She’s an introvert who has struggled with depression most of her life and has a very, very small safety net of family and friends close by. Because of her loneliness she spent a lot of time on social media. That’s when she was scammed out of $62,000 on Facebook. How would you feel?
(BTW – If a Facebook “friend” tells you they’ve won money and they saw that you’re on the list, don’t fall for it!)
She’s an intelligent woman. How could this happen? She was in a vulnerable state, lonely and depressed. The scammers have their protocol down pat. And, when she lost the first little bits of money, the programming from her youth kicked in unconsciously, staying involved at the very least to get her money back. When she first called me, she was very low, energetically it was like she was wearing a ton of bricks. Beating herself up with a mix of emotions – angry, sad, humiliated, and afraid of how she would manage financially. Full of regret and feeling guilty because some of that money was inherited from her parents who worked hard and saved hard all their life… You can imagine…
We did 6 sessions over a 2 week period. First we focused on releasing anger and sadness. Then fear. Then we needed to go back to sadness because she could feel more coming to the surface and she was afraid the abyss of full blown depression was not far away. Then we released guilt and shame, and some limiting beliefs. She felt considerably more balanced about the whole thing and you could hear it in her voice. Her outlook had totally shifted.
We talked weeks after and she was still in a positive emotional state… even though she couldn’t get her money back. She now talked about the situation without any negative emotional reaction. She is no longer taking it personally or blaming herself (or others). And she has a better understanding the layers of emotions, programming and limiting beliefs that all played their part. Most importantly, she is no longer coming from that place of reaction and is giving herself more compassion.
Consequently she has more choice in the moment on how she will respond. The voice in her head has changed its story. I can’t say that she won’t ever have feelings of sadness or depression again in her life. But I can say her perspective on this experience won’t take her there. As we know, life continually provides triggers to show us where we need healing or growth.
“I highly recommend Linda Lang, in fact I can’t recommend her highly enough! Her natural abilities, along with her vast training which she combines together in such a unique way, is unlike anything I have ever experienced before. I have done a fair amount of personal growth work myself, through various modalities and trainings, but Linda has assisted me to access some things on a deeper level than ever before which is truly amazing. Many thanks Linda.” ~ Debby, NZ