Step into the mystical landscape of karmic relationships and soul patterns with past life hypnotherapist and psychic healer Karen Kubicko.

In this illuminating episode, we unravel the hidden dynamics shaping our relationships—not just from childhood or family, but woven through lifetimes. Why do some of us attract love easily while others find themselves repeating cycles of pain or facing loneliness? Karen shares how uncovering past life roots can be the catalyst for profound transformation.

 

Here are three empowering takeaways from this soul-nourishing conversation:

🔹 Break Free from Old Patterns: Recognize that abusive, unfulfilling, or elusive relationships may have deeper, past life origins. Through regression and intuitive guidance, you can identify the “root cause”—that energetic imprint or soul vow that set patterns in motion—and consciously release them, opening space for true healing and love.

🔹 Rediscover Your Inner Light: Sometimes, we need a frame of reference for love. Past life regression can help you reclaim memories of having been genuinely loved—restoring hope and shifting your energetic vibration. This self-remembrance is a profound step on the journey to self-love and empowered relationships.

🔹 Love Yourself Into Wholeness: Whether your pattern is people-pleasing, perfectionism, or dimming your light, awareness is the first step to breaking free. As Karen beautifully shares, “You are wanted and loved in your relationships. You don’t have to be ‘extra.’” Own the story of your healing, not your wounding.

This episode is an inspiring invitation: Embrace every aspect of your soul’s journey. With awareness, forgiveness, and courage, you can transform your patterns—across all relationships—and embody the love and wholeness your spirit has always known.

Tune in for a gentle dose of wisdom, courage, and hope. Your path to authentic connection and true love begins within.

Transcript:

Linda Lang:
Why do some people seem to find love effortlessly while others struggle through one painful relationship after another? Is it bad luck, poor choices? Or could there be something much deeper at work? Today we’re diving into karmic relationships to explore why certain patterns repeat what they may be teaching us and how to finally break free from them. Stay tuned. Welcome to Exploring the Mystical side of Life with your host, Linda Lang. Hi, this is Linda Lang from ThoughtChange.com. We are exploring the mystical side of life once again this week. Today we are talking past lives and how they affect your current relationships. I have past life hypnotherapist and psychic healer Karen Kubicko with me. Welcome, Karen.

Karen Kubicko:
Thanks, Linda. I really appreciate you having me on your show.

Linda Lang:
Before we jump into relationships, can you share a little bit about how you got down this track of exploring past lives?

Karen Kubicko:
When my second child was in the midst of being born, we both almost died. We both had a near death experience. And not long after that experience, I saw her being held by my passed-over grandfather and in the middle of the night. And I was like, I didn’t know who that was at the moment. I’m just like, who’s holding my baby? And so I did something I had never done before, I went to see a psychic. And they said to me that she had a really strong third eye and that if I didn’t help her understand that it, it wouldn’t be good. And so I was like, I don’t even know what a third eye is.

I grew up Catholic. I didn’t have any of that background knowledge on metaphysics at all. And so I started delving in. And finally when she was around three and a half, I found a book on children’s past lives. And I was like, weird stuff, big kid stuff. And I, I couldn’t put the book down and I just was… I never looked back. I have read and read, and learned and studied. I studied under Brian Weiss and I did all kinds of training and things to, to be where I’m at, to help others understand that they too can heal from past life regression. It’s just an… you see your whole soul experience and it helps.

Linda Lang:
And aside from the healing potential, it’s incredibly fun to explore back here.

Karen Kubicko:
It can be, for sure. I mean, the fun part of it really, Linda, is that you are able to go… and I don’t get a chance to talk about this too much… you can go to a past life where you were an amazing intuitive being or amazing healer or very confident and reclaim that connection, reclaim that knowledge and bring it into this current lifetime. It’s almost like you can channel that confidence because it’s really still you having that same experience.

Linda Lang:
I almost think of it as a code in your DNA that you haven’t turned on yet. Right? And then when you have that awareness, and that intention, and the know how, you turn it on and all of a sudden it’s part of your experience here.

Karen Kubicko:
Right. The way that they show to me sometimes is that we have chakras that are above our crown that connect into this higher dimensional aspect of us here on this earth plane. And when you connect into that, you’re consciously aware of that higher dimensional aspect, your energy field expands and you’re bringing forth that type of knowledge.

Linda Lang:
And I think you can do that actually with, let’s say, “negative patterns” is what I’ll call them, or difficult challenges. I think you can turn that on in your DNA as well. And that often we’ll come here with that written into our life plan because we want to heal it.

Karen Kubicko:
We do. And there’s so much to healing too. I mean, it’s healing stuff from this life. You might be healing stuff that’s been passed along ancestrally, through DNA and that type of connection. It’s just so much. We’re this beautiful being. We have to remember it, that’s all.

Linda Lang:
Yeah, it’s time. It’s time. And so you can work with your relationships by healing your own past lives. So how did that start to open up for you?

Karen Kubicko:
It’s fascinating. My first book, Life is Just Another Class, is about 16 of my own past lifetimes. And when I was finished with that book, I was like, what the heck? I’ve hardly had any really nice relationships! And so that, that was like interesting to notice. And around the same time I started providing readings to other people where I could delve into their past lives, their current day stuff, work with their angels and spirit guides. And I started to notice, “Well, this is interesting. There’s a pattern here. There’s a common root cause for why you’ve closed your heart and why you have abusive relationships,” which are always somewhat frustrating to get out of, in your own humanness.

You don’t even realize the patterns that have happened through family stuff. But sometimes you have to go deeper because you have to figure out, “Well, why did I first of all choose your parents?” Because you have. And a lot of people don’t like it when I say that because it’s tough. Sometimes parents are tough, but you’ve picked them to be able to go through those experience so that you can once and for all break that pattern of some kind. When I started to go through and help someone to understand why they’re in a particular relationship, why that person keeps coming back in their life even though they’re detrimental, then we can go back to the root cause in a sense. And I tell people to think about it like this: if all your lifetimes are lined up and this is the root cause that happened many lifetimes ago, you have to pull it out by the root, like a weed, to get to the bottom of it.

And so I try to tune into as best I can, or take them into a past life regression, to find that root cause so that they can clear it out, do the forgiveness work, and to release that subconscious flow of energy that’s still holding them back in some kind of way. There’s usually a big “aha moment” happening for them, and that’s the, the, the moment that they get it and that change occurs.

Linda Lang:
So those ruts can be pretty deep if they’re several lifetimes. It compounds absolutely. Do you think everyone who has challenging relationships or abusive relationships have the roots in past life?

Karen Kubicko:
I have seen so much like that, Linda. I, I would suspect that it’s not always 100% of the time, but I’ve helped so many people try to find their root cause for their relationship, whatever. You have to go back to the thought process of you’re not just having this human experience at this moment, and that you’re the sum total of all your lifetimes coming forward into this current life. And if you have some, I hate to call it karma, to be honest, but it’s almost like something that you haven’t learned, to stand up for yourself, to communicate. Those are two big ones that come through to open your heart up again. That’s when people close their hearts in a past life. I noticed in one example that I have written about in the Making True Love book, someone closed their heart in a early lifetime long ago.

And then because they never wanted to feel that pain and suffering again emotionally, because the person they cared about so deeply, and loved and respected each other so deeply, passed in some traumatic type of way. They swore on a kind of a soul level, or made a vow or commitment, “I’m never going to open my heart to that again. I never want to go through that experience of pain,” like that emotionally. And so, then in future lifetimes, they had abusive relationships or they’ve had no relationships because they’re like, “Well, if that person dies, I’m not going to feel any kind of like sadness or grief, and it won’t hurt as bad.” And when you come to that recognition, you’re like, “What? Wait a second, that’s why I did all this?” It almost seems ridiculous. But on a soul level, you’re protecting yourself.

And because you have no awareness that that even occurred, and is connected to why you are the way you are in this current life, it’s a… it’s almost like a game-changer in a sense, relationship-wise, because you’re more aware of why you’re choosing that.

Linda Lang:
So interesting, really, because some people seem to have no issues in love at all. And then there are other people. They just can’t either find someone or they attract abuse after abuse after abuse. How can they break that pattern? Either one of those?

Karen Kubicko:
It’s… it’s hard. I mean, the abuse pattern itself, it’s tough because first of all, you have to recognize you’re in the pattern and that… I hate to say that you’re, like, you’re kind of in charge of that in a sense, but it’s someone else can only love you as much as you love you. And I noticed that there is an abuse-love pattern that tends to happen where it’s, it’s a random reward addiction situation where you’re abused, abused, abused, and then you randomly get love. And then you forget about the abuse, and then you go back into the abuse, abuse, abuse, and then you randomly get loved or they show some kind of kindness to you and you forget about the abuse. Because maybe you grew up in this current life where you were abused by a parent and then shown that you were cared about or loved, or you expected that, that love to be like that. My spirit guides brought to my attention.

It’s no different than someone in an abusive relationship expecting to receive that random little influx of “I care about you” or “I love you.” Because that’s what they’re used to and that’s what they’re expecting. I hate to say, it’s kind of like an addiction. You’re not aware of it when you’re in it, you know, but it’s that randomly being reward, forgetting about all of the past stuff that they’ve done to you.

Linda Lang:
That person doesn’t realize they’re in an abusive relationship, but everyone around them will.

Karen Kubicko:
Yeah, for sure. Or mention it to them and they’re like, “No, no, it’s fine. No, I’m good,” you know. And they totally maybe rationalize it away because they want to. They’re, they’re desperate for that love and affection that they maybe never have received in this life.

Linda Lang:
How does exploring past lives actually help shift that in the mind so they can change your life experience?

Karen Kubicko:
There’s two ways that it can be addressed. And sometimes when I’m helping somebody remember a past life, or even providing them a reading about what it is that their root causes… their spirit guides honestly are always in charge of the experience…. That’s a hundred percent…. But normally what happens is that sometimes they go directly to the root cause and are shown it, and you get that. I can do forgiveness work and forgive every aspect involved with that. Just to understand why you’re here at this moment, because you get that higher dimensional perspective. And so you’re clearing out that and forgiving that trauma first of all. And then secondarily, and sometimes we go directly here, I take them to…

Or their spirit guide takes them to a past life where they have been so incredibly loved and cared about. Because in this current life they have no frame of reference for that. They don’t even know what that feels like, should look like. And so that really, that becomes a game-changer. When I learned about how to do that, or even that was a choice, was so many years ago, I was working with this one woman and I’m being shown she’s in an abusive relationship, and continuously, in this lifetime. And I’ve been shown many of her past lives where she was, again, in abusive relationship.

And I just saw her energy darken, dim, darken, dim. And I’m like, “Hey guys, this isn’t working. What can we do to help her? This isn’t working for her.” And they’re like, “Let’s just show her a lifetime where she’s had an amazing time. Someone incredibly loved her.” And I did that, and her energy went from dim and dark, to I have hope, you know, and I have been loved at some point in my lifetimes. You know what I mean? Not just in this life. That hope really brought some brightness to her energy and helped her in a deeper way.

Linda Lang:
So do you actually see people then shift their life pattern?

Karen Kubicko:
I’m able to see the shift in their pattern of things. It’s not always obvious, I don’t think sometimes to them, but it becomes obvious to me. And I’m very grateful to be part of that healing process.

Linda Lang:
And what about people that just can’t seem to find a partner? That love seems elusive?

Karen Kubicko:
Yeah, that’s tough because, you know, I don’t know that we’re expected, on some level, to always have a partner, Linda, you know? And it might be because maybe they deter you from doing what your life passion is. So that’s also part of it, I think.

Linda Lang:
I think also it can be the learning experience of having a solo life, and being fully responsible for your life and choices, which we really are anyways. But when there’s no one there to lean upon, it’s more obvious.

Karen Kubicko:
Well, you have to learn how to love yourself first and to be happy spending time with yourself, no matter what you’re choosing to do. Because if you can’t find that, how can you share that with someone else? So often I find, and have met people who have been like a chameleon… poof! What do you need? I’ll change into this aspect or this way so that I can be what you want me to be. And they, they lose themselves in that.

Linda Lang:
Are there any other patterns that people should be on the lookout in their relationships?

Karen Kubicko:
I have 11 in that book. So I’m asking my guides, to ask which one I should talk about because there’s, there’s so much we could talk about. But what was very interesting to me, and I found that this was fascinating, people that tend to be a perfectionist or a type A, that everything has to be… you know, you’re like, **extra,** you know what I mean? You go above and beyond the normal person and you have to get all this stuff done, and you sign up for everything, you volunteer for everything, and you’re like doing, doing, doing, doing, doing for everybody else. That perfectionism-type of personality, that type A personality. Personally, that was fascinating because I was definitely part of that team at one point in my life.

But what tends to be a common root cause was not expected. It is the person that I’m regressing or even for myself, you go back to a past life where you felt like you were a burden and unwanted in some deep kind of way, and you had to prove yourself, that you were worthy to be in the relationship, to be at that job, to be with your friends, and continuously prove to them endlessly that you’re worthy enough to be in that.

And so then that creates that pattern of being a perfectionist or a type A type of pattern. But really when you start to see that, “Oh, I’m just trying to prove myself, they’re going to pay me at my job, no matter what I do. My friends love and accept me. I don’t know why I feel like I have to do all this extra stuff for them. Why do I do that?” Or, gosh, in the same note, you’re forgetting to take care of yourself and to do things for you, which is so common, especially for women. We’re kind of brainwashed, taught that, even in some of the old TV shows from whenever I was younger. It’s ridiculous.

Like, “Oh, forget about me. Let me take care of you.” You know what I mean? And it’s definitely eye opening when you start to see that deep connection and that you’re not a burden. You are wanted and loved in that relationship, in whether it’s work, family, or friendship. And you don’t have to be that “extra.” They’re going to care about you no matter what.

Linda Lang:
So you brought up a really good point, that it doesn’t have to be a romantic relationship. It could be parents, siblings. Bosses. Correct, all that. So people should look for repetitive patterns in any relationship, really. True.

Karen Kubicko:
I know from my own experience, I went from being in a narcissistic type of relationship and then recognized that where I was working, my boss was also gaslighting me and, and everything. And I was like, “What am I trying to learn here?” You know, because it was not obvious. I didn’t even know what that word meant at one point, you know? And so when you start to delve in and do the inner work, Linda, you recognize how much more you truly are as this beautiful spiritual being. And you’re truly on a mission, in a sense, to learn how to overcome this type of thing. Because who we really are, in a spiritual sense, we don’t have to go through all this trauma and drama.

Linda Lang:
You know, I’ve heard that very same comment about “What am I trying to learn through these really challenging experiences?” so many times because it’s not always obvious when you’re in the middle of it.

Karen Kubicko:
It is not. It is not. I mean, part of the inspiration for me to write Making True Love is chapter 18. If you even think, for one, that maybe you’re in a bad situation in a relationship. I have every bit of that chapter free on my website at karenkubicko.com, and you can read through some of that stuff. And I included it in that book because I, I stayed at a woman’s shelter. It’s not something I often talk about.

I mention it briefly in that book. I’ve dedicated it to that particular shelter, that book. And I mean, when I was in the middle of going through that experience, I did not understand why. I gave up my faith at that time. True, true fact, and thought there couldn’t be a God. Why would I have gone through all this type of thing? And, you know, I got to the point much, much later, 20 years later, after that where I started to recognize, okay, so if I had not gone through that experience, then I would not have been able to talk to so many other women who’ve gone through similar situations, where they were also in a detrimental relationship, with calm and ease. And I get and understand what you’re going through, because I wouldn’t have had that perspective. Not that I’m suggesting that every person that goes through that, it’s for a reason I can explain and help others learn how to overcome it, release it, forgive it, which is no easy task, and to move on with your life and find that happy space within, no matter what.

Linda Lang:
And so how did you go back through your past experiences?

Karen Kubicko:
When I first started, I was listening to a self hypnosis guided meditation. And it literally took me 30 days of trying. And sometimes I’d fall asleep, I’d be like, darn it. And I’d, I pushed the button again and listened to it again. I was very, I guess, persistent.

Linda Lang:
Resistant and persistent.

Karen Kubicko:
Yeah, I didn’t give up. And I finally, on the 30th try, I remembered a snippet of one past lifetime. First of all, I was a male, and I was like, “Wait, I’m a guy?” You know, and I had asthma at the time. And my intent was to remember a lifetime, to help me uncover and release that connection to having asthma in this life. And the lifetime that came up for me was the lifetime that helped me heal. Took five years of remembering bits and pieces to understand the whole process before I got to that, that spot. But I’m coughing, and I was coughing out loud, which I thought was weird. I was coughing out loud in the memory, like it was actually happening. I was trying to blow pitifully, I couldn’t, on this fire that I didn’t know how to create. And there’s sweat dripping down my face through a beard that I was like, “I don’t even know why I have this beard. I’m so unkempt.” And it, it was, t was helpful. It was… I felt better. It was weird.

So I kept continuing to listen to the self hypnosis. I found someone locally that did past life regression work and went to them, I think, three different times over several years. And then I convinced my girlfriend, who is an RN, to read through a script. And so every week or so, she’d come over while the kids were in school and we’d play around with it. And I am indebted to her, honestly. Fabulous experience to have that opportunity to do that. And it brought about my first book, and then some of that information is then in the Making True Love book. And so here we are…

Linda Lang:
And so true that another can guide you a little bit deeper so you have greater access. The most fascinating thing to me is that just the knowledge or the memory of that life can often be enough to shift it in this life.

Karen Kubicko:
From my perspective, it’s always about helping you in this current lifetime. Really, Linda. It’s fun, for sure, to find and research these past lifetimes because it, it helps you understand who you are, even why you’re so musically-minded for this particular instrument, or you’re so interested in this type of art, or that time period, or whatever. That in and of itself is fascinating. But when it starts to help you understand why you are you in this life and why you love that music, it explains it.

Linda Lang:
With so many past lives, so many patterns, so many challenges in relationships, or not necessarily challenges, but still patterns, how do we actually know what is really us and what is not a pattern that we’ve created from the past? Whether it’s to appease someone else or because we think we’re bad or unworthy or unlovable. Like, it could go really both ways. We could think, “Oh, you know, I can handle it, it’s okay, I’ll just do what they want because I’m stronger than they are.” And that can create a pattern. Right?

Karen Kubicko:
Right. I mean, when you’re giving all your energy away like that, Linda, to somebody else, sometimes you’re doing them a disservice because they don’t learn how to be responsible for raising their own vital life for energy. And beyond past life stuff, if you think of you and your energy aspect as a battery, in a sense, and you are giving your energy away to that person to make them feel better endlessly, they’re never going to learn how to raise their own vibration, their own vital life force energy. Which can be done, because I feel like somebody’s going to ask that question, “Well, how do you do that?” Which can be done by focusing on positive affirmations. I’m a huge, huge fan of that. Finding something that makes you laugh. I mean, whatever that is, that is an immediate raise. Being creative, being out in nature, just enjoying the sunrise, something simple, that first sip of coffee, whatever makes you feel I love my life or whatever.

I mean, you are raising your own vital life force energy. And if you’re giving it away, giving it away… and sometimes people do need taken care of. Yes, okay. But when you recognize that if you’re giving your energy away to someone who’s fully capable, you know, they need to learn on some level, or maybe you can provide them inspiration to, “Hey, let’s go on a walk in nature.” Then you’re teaching them on a sense, in a sense, to how to raise their own life force energy, their own vibration, to find their own inner happiness and to, instead of someone being negative, negative, negative, “Well, can you tell me something positive about your day? Is there something that you’re grateful for?” You know what I mean? And you’re changing that pattern whether they realize it or not.

Because the next time they talk to you, if you ask that same question again, “What great thing happened to you today? What made you smile today?” Then they’ll be looking for what made them smile versus what made them feel bad. Because that again, is another kind of pattern. Right?

Linda Lang:
The message that came in was that these patterns can originate either in love or in fear. You could love someone so much and want to help them and help them and help them, or you can be afraid and not want negative situations.

Karen Kubicko:
You don’t want to rock the boat.

Linda Lang:
Exactly, exactly. So then that pattern gets entrenched. So that makes it a little tricky to decipher whether it’s a pattern that’s helping you or hindering you. And the message that came through was that we all have like a little boundary radar thingy, that it’s like, you know, like as soon as you feel that…

Karen Kubicko:
Oh yeah.

Linda Lang:
And then if you do it anyways, you’ve just kind of violated your own inner knowings.

Karen Kubicko:
True. And to your point that, that I’ve actually used that exact thing that you just said that I don’t know, you know, you’re feeling, it’s off. And I tell people, or I make them recognize, “Look, when you’re with this particular person, you both feel good, you both feel raised up, your energy both feels excited to be with each other. And then when you’re with this person that maybe you’re dating, or another friend, and you feel like you’re here when you start out and they’re down here, and then all of a sudden you’re like depleted and need to recharge and this person feels better when you left, you’ve just given all your energy away to them.” And so when you are very mindful of how you feel when you’re around somebody, does it deplete you? Or do you feel both good afterwards? That’s the, that’s the, the litmus test, in a sense.

Linda Lang:
And so another thing I’d like to just share before we wrap up is that you can give your power away to someone else, but you can also give it to the pattern. You can give it to that, “Well, I’m an abused person” or “I’m a ____,” whatever. And you are not stepping into your power. You may have been an abused person, but you can, you can change that pattern.

Karen Kubicko:
How do you want to define yourself, right, Linda? Because that’s, that’s huge. Because I’ll never forget the moment I met this lady one time in a class. She’s like, well, “I have cancer.” I’m like, “I thought you had just said you’re in remission for 10 years. Do you still really want to own that story?” You don’t have it. Right? You’re healed. You’re a healed person. You’ve overcome it and you’ve grown from it, but you can’t own that story. It’s no different than a pattern. Right?

Linda Lang:
Exactly. Exactly. Words of wisdom.

Karen Kubicko:
“I only allow mutually supportive and loving connections and experiences in my life” is my favorite, favorite mantra.

Linda Lang:
Beautiful, beautiful. Karen, it’s been delightful chatting with you today.

Karen Kubicko:
Likewise, Linda.

Linda Lang:
Where can we send people who want to know more about your work, your books?

Karen Kubicko:
I have a website, KarenKubicko.com and I’ll spell my last name. It’s K-U-B, as in boy, I-C-K-O. So, at KarenKubicko.com you can access. I have a YouTube channel with lots of meditations and teachings. I have a course on there that you can take if you’re interested in learning about your own past lives that you can follow along. I have guided meditations for all that type of thing. I have books on Amazon that you’re welcome to check out and find more information on. And you can set up a personal experience with me as well.

Linda Lang:
And today we were talking about Making True Love: Healing Relationship Patterns Through Past Life Regression. (book)

Karen Kubicko:
Yes, I mean, it’s very, very meaningful book to me on a lot of levels. So I hope someone listening finds peace from having that.

Linda Lang:
Peace, and maybe a little courage.

Karen Kubicko:
Oh, yes, courage. Perfect word. Thank you.

Linda Lang:
Thank you again, Karen. And thank you for listening to this week’s edition of Exploring the Mystical side of Life. If you enjoy our conversations, remember to subscribe, share with a friend. Come Visit me at ThoughtChange.com. Pick up your copy of Learning to Listen. We will see you again next time. Bye for now.