Relationships are one of the greatest challenges we can have sometimes. Not always rosy… happily ever after, like the fairy tales promise.

It is funny how 2 people who truly care about each other can sometimes bring out the worst in each other. I have seen it in a number of couples, and even between friends. somehow things just go awry.  Even with good intentions, sometimes buttons get pushed, past the place of a healthy relationship.

From a place of unity consciousness, I don’t always understand… doesn’t love heal all things?  I can’t help but think that there is a bigger picture going on that we just cannot see, a plan for our benefit that is beyond our awareness.

Things aren’t always love and light, or at least don’t seem that way on this human level of consciousness, and sometimes distance is the best advice. Relationships built on fears, unhealthy needs or out of loneliness don’t have a strong foundation to survive and thrive.

I’ve seen some close friends get intensely triggered in their relationships, calling up their inner demons and challenging qualities, creating only struggle. And the same would go for the partner. After years of struggling, they usually give up. The obstacles are just too great. Maybe they are simply great teachers for each other, or maybe mirrors of what yet needs to be healed. Somehow it is part of their path, their evolution and experience of self…

Sometimes people recreate unhealthy relationships. If the partnership doesn’t have a strong essence of self love, acceptance and mutual respect, the old baggage will surface once again.  The faces may change but the story stays the same.

And I’ve seen examples where both former partnersfound new partners.  Partners that are a good fit, that accept them as they are and love them without question. These relationships work really well; they are supportive and somehow they bring out the best in each other. Perhaps the inner stories have healed and everyone learned what they needed to learn so they can now move on.

Doesn’t mean things are easy when relationships dissolve… even if things amicable and a mutual decision.

Your relationships can be a great indicator of needing to do some inner work, of your own healing, and of committing to yourself. It might be time to put your own health and welfare first.

Love yourself first, and then another.